Dare to Say What Others Can't

Today, I read a fascinating article on my favorite fitness blog, Stumptuous.com, that got me thinking.

It basically said that telling others the things you are ashamed of, or that are difficult for you to deal with, gives you power over those those same things.

Shame thrives on being kept secret. When you talk about the dark moments, you suddenly realize that you're not alone, and that others share them, too.
This made me think about writing because one of my favorite writing quotes is "The role of a writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." --Anais Nin

We have the freedom in our stories to talk about the shameful thoughts we all have, or relive experiences that are difficult to deal with in real life. I feel like this is freeing for both myself and the reader.

I heard a woman read from her book (I, of course, forget who) and relay a story of dropping soup she made for a church function into a gutter, and for a single moment, thinking about scooping it back into the tourine. No one would know, right?

Well, when she read that passage we all laughed because we got it. We've all experienced those same awful inner moments where we realize that maybe we're not good people. When we read about it, we're free to admit it, and realize it's not so different after all.

We're all just human, and these things are part of the experience.

What do you guys think? As writers, or readers, do you find it helpful to throw light onto those darker moments?

Just Do It

As I was in the gym today, laboring under a squat bar and trying to figure out what was wrong with my "squattin' form," I had an epiphany. What I've been doing wrong for about two weeks is trying to control my squat, and by being a control freak, had not been letting my body drop low enough to do the exercise correctly.

I finally put the heavy metal stuff down and decided to just see if I needed to stretch to do it right, and BAM! The second I just decided to let go and see how far down I could really go... I did it. My ass hit grass, and I realized I went down lower than I ever thought possible in that moment.

(Here's a link to some awesome "how to squat" videos that led to my revelation: http://www.stumptuous.com/lurn-to-squat-good-e-zy)

This got me to thinking--this is a lot like some of the breakthroughs I've had in my writing. I can be such a control freak that I have a hard time letting go and letting myself go ass-to-grass with my story.

My husband is amazing at getting me to let go my white-knuckled grip on "propriety," and helps me get down to the dark places where I need to go for my novel. For example, I was having a hard time writing a fairly violent scene and kept thinking "my grandma is going to read this, my mom is going to read this, the church will hear about this..." and couldn't just let go and write already.

My man sat me down with a notebook and threw down this challenge: Write down the most visceral, awful thing you can think of. No inhibitions. No worries. No grandmas watching.

What I wrote in those few minutes (the words have a tendency to flow when you let up a little), turned out to be awful and yes, totally awesome. I actually have incorporated that exercise as a pivotal part in my novel. It's weird, but in that uninhibited space I did some of my best writing.

So here is my question for you guys:

Do you have any moments where you found yourself truly going Ass-To-Grass in your writing? How did it pay off?

If you haven't, I challenge you here and now. Throw down your hang ups, and GO FOR IT. Whatever you wanted to write but never could, the secret is, you CAN.

The only one stopping you is you.

Progress update!

Hi, All,

Progress Update Time!

Recently I've been working feverishly on revising my novel, LEGACY OF THE EMPRESS to make the ending stronger. My mom and husband had some awesome things to contribute (my mother is a hard woman to please) and I've been working on the ideas I agree with, fleshing them out and making my story fuller.

Today, I got three AWESOME volunteers from the query tracker forums to be my first officially non-family member Beta Readers. I'm so excited and grateful to get their feedback, and am still working to pad out my ending, to get that "Zazz Factor" as high as I can. I'm only going to start querying again once I get this feedback, and I'm stoked about the process.

It feels amazing to have the chance to have another chance to make your work not just "ok" but "great."

As a side note, I have another work in progress: my body. My goal is to become stronger and leaner slowly but surely. I'm starting some heavy weight lifting (squats, deadlifts, assisted pull ups, bench presses, etc) and working on not eating as much crap.

If you are starting a strength training or weight loss regimen to get rid of that "writer's butt," I highly recommend www.stumptuous.com. It's literally THE BEST website ever for ladies wanting to get fit, and dispels a lot of myths and lies we've heard our whole lives.

Yes, bitches can lift heavy things. No, it won't turn you into a grotesque She-Hulk. Enough said. We can do it!

Wish me luck, and good luck to all of you on your various Works in Progress :).