Sorry I've been silent on this blog for so long :). I've been working stuff out in my own life and needed some time away.
Recently, I've come to realize a lot of what I'm doing is burning me out, emotionally and physically. I'm the kind of person who goes completely gung-ho, 100% whenver I have a goal. My family always told me that if I wasn't striving to be the absolute best I could be, I was wasting my gifts and potential. This made me think that if I wasn't writing constantly, constantly trying to get published, and constantly stuffing my brain full of publishing industry news and information, then I didn't deserve to call myself a writer.
This got to be an awful lot of pressure and burned me out like a lightbulb.
My top priorities in life are hanging out with my husband, and then trying to find a way to use the gifts God gave me :). However, when priority #2 got in the way of priority #1, I'd feel guilty for not doing more of #2.
The major problem with that is that then I'm guilty when I'm choosing to hang out with my husband instead of sending a query, or guilty when I'm taking some time to paint or draw (something else I enjoy) instead of working on my novel. Why should I feel guilty for using other gifts or being with the people I love?
It took me a while to realize... I shouldn't :). There is no reason I shouldn't be doing what makes me happy! Sometimes that's writing, sometimes it's painting, sometimes it's learning Spanish or making jewelry, and sometimes it's playing zombie video games with the man I married.
I've had to figure out how to cut myself some slack. Just because I'm painting tonight instead of writing, doesn't mean I'm not pursuing a writing career. And just because that career might take a while to get started, doesn't mean I'm not a writer. I'm using my gifts, but giving myself permission to live my life in my own time.
Have any of you ever struggled with this? How do you prioritize? How do you keep from burning out on the things you love?
From now on, I'll be updating this blog, but it may be more of a mish-mash of creative pursuits, instead of 100% writing-related ;). I also will probably only update weekly for a time.
Thanks all for reading, for being awesome writing friends and supporters, and for being a part of this phase of my journey. You rock!